Stand Tall
Stand High upon your perch
Clean and Proud.
Wing span stretched out above the water,
Frigid Wind underneath your wing
Serves to Hold you up.
"Notice Me," I silently cry out.
Carelessly craning his head my way.
Effortlessly, you Decide your Path.
How envious I am of your Freedom,
Your whim and perhaps unbroadcasted Purpose.
Stand Tall
Wing Span revealed,
Lean Forward,
Take Flight.
"Take me with you,
I want to soar just inches
Above the Water,
Across the Bay..."
(c)2008jsblankenship
Words and Thoughts
Feelings and Needs
Desires of every sort...
Coming from every Direction
I was walking, just walking...
It was only rain.
Why is it always rain?
The eye of the storm threatens
to pass and pull me in again
Whirling and Turning
Changing and Churning
It doesn't matter it's matter
Water, Air, Fire, Flame
It's Current Stronger than I
I don't want to disappear again
But is that not what I have already done?
Disappeared on myself...
The Five-Pointed Cosmos
Swirling Their Forces
Where will this Ever...Peak?
I simply Want to Land on my feet
Heart in Hand
Alive, Awake
Renewed and True
If I leave the ground, am I out of control?
Is that what I really seek?
Can I bring about Change
Without stirring the Cosmos
Or is it All that Phenomenal?
(c)2008jsblankenship
"You need chaos in your soul to give birth to a dancing star."
Niectche
Actually, the dancing has been quite good...
She waits for me to complete this cycle
She waits for me to clear this all out
She waits for me and misses me
She thinks I want to be apart from her
But tonight she wants to give that space freely
She wants to honor the day it is
And for that I love her so...
She doesn't fully understand the place I go into
I hope she'll trust it's not away that I go
Only inward to stoke the fire
Especially this time of year
My fire must be kindled
Quiet time spent in the forest of my soul
The wood must be found, split, prepared
It has to be stacked and covered to keep ready to burn
And placement is so important
Each log leaving air for the others to burn
A bed of ashes to reflect the heat is always essential from the fire burned before
She waits for me
I just hopes she knows
The fire I tend is not just for me
I have to maintain it in order to be the one she knows me to truly be.
She need not feel left out in the cold.
This fire will warm her too.
(c)2008jsblankenship
78 years
I wish you could have made 78 years.
What would we have learned from one another by your 78th year?
Its been 14 years since you left
And so much has fallen apart...
How could you have had enough love for that many people who can't seem to love themselves ?
I still miss you somedays in pain
And still see your fingers on the hands that held mine well.
And cared for me and understood my strange, loving humor in this world of perplexity.
You always cared, seemingly without need
You taught me unconditional Love,
You gave me a glimpse of the Rapture,
Of the Face of God.
What more could any child need,
From their Mother or any parent.
The only thing I regret,
That will always bring me tears,..
Is that we simply ran out of time...
So I keep, we all keep talking
Even though you took your leave.
(c)2008jsblankenship
If I promise not hold on too tight
Will you come to me?
If I promise not to make you stay
Will you sit with me?
If I promise not to make you promise,
Will you tell me all you had to say?
I still feel you here but it's easier now
Because instead of distant longing,
You've become a part of me.
I always wondered what it must have felt like
To be beautiful as you,
Now, the greatest gifts I could recieve,
Serendipitously, come from the lack of you.
I see your beauty inside my eyes,
I feel your confidence inside my heart,
Your passion burns inside my veins
As I struggle to be my own.
If I promise not to hold on too tight,
Will you come and never leave?
(c)2008jsblankenship
"...It's a muddy line between the things you want
and the thing things you have to do..."
--Sheryl Crowe, Leaving Las Vegas
So many words,
So little said...
What use is poetry,
If it communicates confusion
Or worse, nothing at all ?
Roses open, petal by petal
revealing their center, beautifully.
Lovers open their souls layer by layer,
as one peeling an onion, revealing their beautiful centers.
When layers pile up -- unlike being stripped away --
Its just Adding Chaos to a life born untattered.
Houses open for visitors,
akin to souls open for love
Welcoming change for growth,
changes to all
No possessing, no ownership
Collisions perhaps
Needing for Nourshing,
Flourishing for the Journey.
Sail on to Drift, Seek and Start anew...
But houses can store up clutter
as a Soul protects its fears.
Layers upon layers upon layers
Dusty and Rigid from Neglect
So many Keys to the Locked up buried Self
Which one, or how many, are useful?
Restless Hearts
Troubled Souls
Longing for Peaceful Calm
But the Storms are gaining
speed and strength.
Pray the Storms pass us overhead
No more chaos, no clutter
Clean, Clean, Peel, Peel
Layer after Layer
Pray Peace in this House tonight.
(c)2008jsblankenship
Roses
Onions
Layers
Peeling
Adding
Chaos
Houses
Their Spirits
Changes to Self
Changes to Other
Storing
Hiding
Layers and Layers
Of Keys
Restless
Troubled
Peaceful
Storms gaining
Storms passing
Where to land
In Layers
Souls
No Possession
Collisions, yes
Nourishing
Flourishing
or Sail on
To drift
Seek
and Start anew...
(c)2008jsblankenship
Perhaps my time with her was for the winter
Perhaps was for the time alone
Perhaps she came to send me
On that walk for all my time
All I know is that I miss that rain
I miss that quiet
I miss that love and peace I'd rediscovered that day...
I found that '...which I may desire...'
She did come in truth
More truth than I've ever known.
But lost that Home that I'd built myself.
Where is it?
Encapsulated in chemicals?
Folded up in books stored tatered and moldy?
I cannot and she would not keep me from it.
I failed to fully communicate the richness of winter in my heart, so it became hidden and lost and foriegn.
It's not frightening.
It's not dangerous.
I'll never let it harm you.
But to keep this huge huge part of me hibernating endlessly will surely kill the 3 of us
The you, the me, the we.
(c)2008jsblankenship
They haunt me and taunt me,
playing with my conscience
My response? Reckless abandonment of right
or perhaps relentless abashment of my worth
responsibility:
the social force that binds you to the courses of action demanded by that force; "we must instill a sense of duty in our children"; "every right implies a responsibility; every opportunity, an obligation; every possession, a duty"- John D.Rockefeller, Jr.
I have made a decision
one that I must make every day
some days tougher than others....days when it appears as if there is no decision to re-make at all
others as heavy as the gargoyles that peer and veer over the estate of my life
This decision to uphold, protect and respect
to honor the victorious, the only thing that exists.
But I'm guilty
I entertain them, these Demons and Devils
I let them linger too closely to beckon me and wail
They lie, they pander, they lay odds at my feet
But true I stay, toeing the line for play
Entertainment or boredom or the need to conquer
Goes back to the abandonment of me
(c)2008jsblankenship
Forty Days, with...without
They asked me to imagine my world without you
Just for Forty Days
You asked me to Love
That's all, to Love
Not to imagine
Not to hate
Not to fear
To Love
Forty Days times Forty times Forty...
I have never known a fear of my life without You
Your blessing, Your Grace bestowed unto me
Never a moment when I feared You gone
Or threaten to leave...
Forty Days
Forty Days You did without
Suffering more than that without hesitation
Blood and beatings
Humiliation and Hate
Tears and Fears for us the Easy People
father, my father, can you take these Forty
Pray for Love and Understanding
and put your fears away.
my Father, He loves me and Always Will
But it is you that I fear I will have to be without.
(c)2008jsblankenship
I Love You, simply
Under those little three:
I know you're scared/hurt/~ and I'm here for you,
I'm sorry,
I feel something full and warm in my chest and it feels like you must have caused it,
You make me laugh,
I'm more happy than I expected to be,
There's Something Larger that brought us here together,
You make me open and ready,
I trust you with anything about me,
I want you,
I need you,
To touch me...
I want you to know that you can trust me with anything about you,
I want you to want me,
I want you to need me,
I want to melt you with my touch,
I want to shelter you,
I'm proud of you,
I'm scared and want you to re-assure me,
You still amaze me,
You surprise me,
I want you, always, I want you.
I Love you...complexly.
(c)2008jsblankenship
